Morning Person? Not So Much

Back in the day when I would ride the Metro to work, it was intriguing watching my fellow passengers morning rituals. Generally you would end up riding with at least a familiar group of 8-10 commuters. I didn't have a ritual other than trying to wake up on my 40 plus minute ride into DC. In fact I enjoyed the privacy of keeping my sunglasses on the entire ride. I was really hiding the fact that I had not a stitch of makeup on; 5:45 am is simply way too early for me to be wrestling with mascara and eyeliner. I would accomplish that task in the ladies room before settling into my office. There you go, that was my ritual.

On one of my commutes in, an impeccably dressed young man sat down next to me. He was a very happy go lucky guy, good for him I thought to myself. Then it happened, he was trying to initiate conversation. Please, it is 5:45 am and I am neither fully awake nor in any kind of mood to converse. One of the golden rules taught to me was ignore them and they will leave you alone. I was stubborn and he persistent. He was nice enough; I just didn't want to be bothered. He did not get the hint. So I moved to phase 2 of my plan. We are now underground and he changed his tactics a bit. He said something like “ you can take your glasses off now. I'd really love to see those eyes.” I kept ignoring him. The problem was that now the entire train was engrossed in our conversation. I also do not like to be the focus of attention in any situation. He too notices that he has an audience and is relentless. He repeats loudly that I no longer need my sunglasses since we are underground. Since my cardinal rule of not drawing attention to myself has been thrown out the window, I take a deep breath and proceed. “ I am BLIND, do you mind?” Loud enough for our audience to participate, why not? I have never seen such a confident person become systematically unraveled till that moment. He profusely apologized and made his way to another seat.

When I got to Metro Center, I gathered my belongings, took off my sunglasses and walked off the train. As I watched the train continue on, I witnessed my would be suitor shaking his head and his audience laughing hysterically.

The name is Wicked, Wicked H. If you know what’s good for you, do not bother me in the morning.