Monday, August 17, 2009

Strange Encounter in the Loo

The building I work in houses many professional businesses. Many of which are medical facilities, the whole realm from basic medical to specialty dental.

While in the public restroom for our floor, I encountered a bratty display of hilarity.

Brat with Impending Dental Appointment (BWIDA): (Whining to her Mother) You ALWAYS make me brush before the dentist, I hate it!
Mother: Oh honey, it won’t kill you. You brush while I use the facilities.
BWIDA: (Heavy sigh) Fine!

I am now out of the stall and washing my hands, BWIDA at the sink next to me. She is brushing her index finger vigorously while I am washing my hands, casting glances at me to see if I will give her up.

Mother: Are you doing a really good job?
BWIDA: Oh yes! I am all done.

I am drying my hands as the Mother comes out of the stall to see her newly “brushed” precious daughter happily sucking down a milkshake.

Mother: What was the purpose of brushing your teeth if you are going to drink the milkshake? You’ll have to do it again!

Poor Bratty McBrat Brat…..

Tuesday, August 11, 2009

Wanted – Acting Lessons

It must just be me.

Could I possibly be the only woman on the planet who does not enjoy any type of shower? Wedding, Baby - none of it.

When the genes for shower adoration were being passed out, I must have been in the extra sarcasm line. It’s not that I am jealous or dislike the shower recipient; I just don’t have the warm and fuzzy feeling while each gift is being opened.

Here, I will practice the typical reactions heard during the gift reveal:
1) Oooooooo
2) Ahhhhhh
3) Awwwww
4) That would look perfect on the baby/in your new home/on your wedding night.


Good, right? Help me. Have I missed any of the key audible responses? I need you!

Perhaps a dose of insulin is indicated. You know for all the sweetness.

Wish me luck!

Thursday, August 06, 2009

You Know Things are not Going Well…..

…..when your car gets towed from the Employee of the Month parking spot.

Unfortunately, I came upon it as the car was being hooked up to the rig. I am not quite sure if the car in fact belonged to the employee of the month or if someone parked there in error.

If it was the former, that is one hell of a way to find out you are no longer employed. If it was the latter, the guy got exactly what he deserved.

Discuss.