Friday, December 31, 2010

Happy New Year!

May peace fill all the empty spaces around you
And in you, may contentment answer all your wishes.
May comfort be yours, warm and soft like a sigh.
And may the coming year
show you that every day is really a first day,
a new year.

Let abundance be your constant companion,
so that you have much to share.
May mirth be near you always,
like a lamp shining brightly
on the many paths you travel.
May you be true love.

-- Author Unknown

Friday, December 24, 2010

(This one is a repeat by me but we are still in a recession!)


From me ("the wishor") to you ("the wishee") please accept without obligation, implied or implicit, my best wishes for an environmentally conscious, socially responsible, politically correct, low stress, non-addictive, gender neutral, celebration of the winter solstice holiday, practiced within the most enjoyable traditions of the religious persuasion of your choice, or secular practices of your choice, with respect for the religious/secular persuasions and/or traditions of others, or their choice not to practice religious or secular traditions at all.

I wish you a financially successful, personally fulfilling and medically uncomplicated recognition of the onset of the generally accepted calendar year 2011, but with due respect for the calendars of choice of other cultures or sects, and having regard to the race, creed, color, age, physical ability, religious faith, choice of computer platform or sexual preference of the wishee.

By accepting this greeting you are bound by these terms that:-

This greeting is subject to further clarification or withdrawal.

This greeting is freely transferable provided that no alteration shall be made to the original greeting and that the proprietary rights of the wishor are acknowledged.

This greeting implies no promise by the wishor to actually implement any of the wishes.

This greeting may not be enforceable in certain jurisdictions and/or the restrictions herein may not be binding upon certain wishees in certain jurisdictions and is revocable at the sole discretion of the wishor.

This greeting is warranted to perform as reasonably may be expected within the usual application of good tidings, for a period of one year or until the issuance of a subsequent holiday greeting, whichever comes first.

The wishor warrants this greeting only for the limited replacement of this wish or issuance of a new wish at the sole discretion of the wishor. Any references in this greeting to "The Lord", "Father Christmas", "Our Savior", "Rudolph the red nosed reindeer" or any other festive figures, whether actual or fictitious, dead or alive, shall not imply any endorsement by or from them in respect of this greeting, and all proprietary rights in any referenced third party names and images are hereby acknowledged.

This greeting is made under United States Law.

Dated this 24th day of December two thousand and ten.

Wednesday, November 24, 2010

Count the Blessings

Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket

Life is too short. Enjoy your family. If you cannot do it honestly, it is my true belief that this is the exact reason alcohol was invented.

Happy Thanksgiving to you and yours!

Sunday, October 31, 2010

Happy Halloween to All, Wishing you a Good Fright!

Who knew? I wasn’t too inspired for the work Halloween dress up deal, but I was a semi good sport and had a version of this on:


Not only did I win best costume but I have not been flirted with this much in forever. I cannot tell you how many men in the office and visiting the office asked if the strike would be over on Monday. The UPS guy was beside himself, he declared “why you gotta be on strike TODAY?”

The ole girl still has it! Shocking!

Have a safe and happy Halloween!

Sunday, October 10, 2010

Save the Ta Ta's

We’ve come a long way baby.

If the entire NFL can rock the pink during Breast Cancer Awareness Month, the least the rest of us can do is be aware and stay healthy.

What we can do; yearly mammograms and monthly self breast exams. Ladies, teach your significant others how to examine your breasts. Might as well be both pro-active and have fun at least once a month.

Although I recommend as much fun per month as humanly possible, the breast exam only needs to be done once.

Use your imaginations. Instead of asking for an autograph from your favorite NFL player, ask for a breast exam. In the name of science, of course.

Monday, October 04, 2010

A New Year, a New Leaf


I have fallen off the blogging wagon and have decided that I need to do better. I lost my inspiration due to some unforeseen circumstances and felt that if I wrote during those times it would be nothing but a whine fest. Certainly not in a humorous way; I spared you all. You are most welcome.

I feel better when I can share what is bouncing around in my head or life. Twitter is nice but my issues demand more than 140 characters. Join me while I kick my way through the fall leaves. One of my fondest memories as a kid, raking the leaves into a huge pile and then running full speed ahead and leaping right in.

Let the leaves fall and the words flow.

Happy 48th to me, the best is yet to come.

Sunday, July 11, 2010

Wallows Accompanying Swallows in Capistrano

This was not my first choice for the title but it was far more entertaining AND it rhymes. These days it is entirely about me changing my tude.

Yes, well about my attitude. It has taken me this long to understand that wallowing is not healthy or productive. I am perfecting the act of making boatloads of lemon aid. Perhaps a career in mixology should be in my future. Never say never maybe a part time gig.

All members of the family who are battling cancer are in the throes of their treatment, they are handling it as best they can. We offer support and encouragement and continue to pray for good news. It is all we can do.

Four members of the family have come over from the Motherland and we have a jam packed tour of the USA all scheduled. I do hope that they wanted every waking second of their trip planned. If not, we will learn to drop back and punt. We are so good at that as a family unit. If you believe that one, I have some ocean front property in Arizona I am happy to give away. Have your people call mine.

Due to work schedule constraints, I am only able to take the second leg of the USA tour. I will gladly take the team of seven to the Big Apple where we will see all the sights on the list. If there are any impromptu shopping excursions planned, I have already decided to duck into the nearest watering hole. I love my family but they love shopping and me, not so much.

Disney World & Universal Studios, if you could ease up on the humidity next week, it would be greatly appreciated. New York, gird your loins. The Family Wicked is on the way soon.

Monday, May 31, 2010

Rainbows and Freakin Unicorns

Pay no attention to the woman behind the curtain.

I am trying to change up the negative karma plaguing me and those I care for. I am running out of options my friends.

Any and all suggestions are welcome.

Saturday, May 22, 2010

Sad Situation


Things, good and bad, come in threes.

Normal daily activities of late have been more than overwhelming, therefore the flowing of creative juices has been stymied. By the end of this week, I realized that certain things are in my control and I really need to just get over myself. I won’t go into detail; it isn’t the reason for this post. I recognize that it is up to me to make lemonade.

In the span of 2 weeks, my family has received three separate and increasingly demoralizing bits of information. We have a very odd unspoken rule regarding not sharing bad news the second we learn of it. It depends on the situation however my excuse it to with hold the tidbit until all facts materialize and then release it to my inner circle. I have found that it is easier to deal all data when it is clearly displayed. What ifs definitely do not work in my family. Another reason to censor is to get hold of my initial reaction before I try to offer comfort to others. It may not be right, but it is how we collectively deal with life.

I wish I had the ability to step in and control the outcome of these three scenarios. Unfortunately, all I can do is be supportive, remain optimistic and pray. Along with things happening in groups of three they also seem to happen for a reason. I would give anything to know that reason and do everything in my power to make it all better. Right now.

Mantra: Pray, optimism and support. It's all I can do.

Saturday, April 17, 2010

Soul Mates, Today is Their Birthday!

Please join me in wishing both my Parents a very happy 80 something birthday. I believe we stopped counting after 80. We should all be so lucky to have our health after that age.

It had to have been destiny that brought my parents together. Same birthdays, day, month and year. Born in the same country but in different cities. If I am not mistaken, Mom may be a few hours older. It is rare, as are they.

I am blessed to have been raised by such a pair. They are a trip without luggage, in the best possible sense.

Here is to many more Mom & Dad. Wishing you happiness today and ALL days.


Hugs and Kisses Wicked and the rest of the Gang.

Thursday, April 01, 2010

Happy Easter, Bawk Bawk

(Sometimes life is stressful and you just need a giggle or belly laugh depending on your sense of humor. This one kept me giggling all day long. I wish the same for you)

A man is driving along a highway and sees a rabbit jump out
across the middle of the road. He swerves to avoid hitting it,
but unfortunately the rabbit jumps right in front of the car. The
driver, a sensitive man as well as an animal lover, pulls over
and gets out to see what has become of the rabbit.

Much to his dismay, the rabbit is dead.

The driver feels so awful that he begins to cry.

A beautiful blonde woman driving down the highway sees a
man crying on the side of a road and pulls over. She steps out
of the car and asks the man what’s wrong.

“I feel terrible,” he explains, “I accidentally hit this rabbit and
killed it.”

The blonde says, “Don’t worry.” She runs to her car and pulls
out a spray can. She walks over to the limp, dead rabbit, bends
down, and sprays the contents onto the rabbit.

The rabbit jumps up, waves its paw at the two of them and hops
off down the road.

Ten feet away the rabbit stops, turns around and waves again,
he hops down the road another 10 feet, turns and waves, hops
another ten feet, turns and waves, and repeats this again and
again and again, until he hops out of sight.

The man is astonished.

He runs over to the woman and demands,”What is in that can?”
The woman turns the can around so that the man can read the
label. It says . .

(Are you ready for this?)

(Are you sure?)

(This is bad!)

(You know you could just click off and not read the punchline)

(You know your gonna be sorry)

(Last chance)

(OK, here it is)

… It says, “Hair Spray – Restores life to dead hair, adds
permanent wave.”

Sunday, March 28, 2010

Smelly Rehearsing for Easter.....


...I think the sunglasses are magical.

I predict many eggs filled with goodies in her future.

Thursday, March 11, 2010

Two New Pets….

Meet Schlemiel and Schlimazel. My window sill at work has become their resting place. Leave it to me to attract two of the ugliest Turkey Buzzards on the planet.


How’s everything with the rest of you?

Wednesday, February 17, 2010

The Natives, We are Restless

I will have to admit, along with the majority of folks within my zip code, that the snow we have had this year is quite enough. It is unprecedented, all of it. It did not kill us, it made us stronger. We would like to vote NO for anymore this season. Thanks for asking.

This past weekend, I escaped to Currituck Sound, NC. My goal was twofold; 1) see landscape without any snow on it and 2) see the water so that I can de-charge. One out of two isn’t bad. I would have been more out of sorts had I not been able to see the Sound from my accommodations. It snowed there Saturday but luckily it was more of a dusting compared to the multiple inches/feet we experienced back home.

The long weekend was spent lounging, drinking and relaxing. At one point in our alcohol induced giddiness we decided that the “NO OLF” signs stood for No Overtly Luscious Females instead of No Outlying Landing Field. I decided I would go to a craft store and purchase many sheets of poster board and add a “G” to the OLF signs. I believe it would seriously damage all the snowbirds that flock down there to hit the links. We were restless, I warned you.


Now that I am in a re-charged state, this weekend Brain Surgeon and I are going to hop on a bus and get into a New York State of Mind. As it is our wont, our only schedule is where we are staying. Typically once we get there we strategize while in the TKTS line as to which shows will be viewing. Also, if I am not mistaken, restaurant week has been extended so we will of course try to fit in as many good eats as humanly possible. We will tip a cocktail or 4 with Frances of She Who Blogs. I am very much looking forward to that.

The only major decision left to make is which ingredients to fill the martini back pack. Start spreading the news, we will be there Friday!


Friday, February 05, 2010

Snowpocolypse 2010

02/08/10: We are now expecting an additional 5 - 12inches of snow on top of this. My liver is ready for the continuation fo the game, my arms and back not ready for more shoveling. Drink up party people.


A majority of the East Coast is expecting record breaking snow starting today and all day Saturday. I am a snow lover right up until I have to begin the process of digging out. Oh well, I must take the good with the bad.

They are forecasting two feet of the white stuff, impressive. I decided I can handle this situation one of two ways. I can panic like the rest of the population and drain the stores of all supplies and wring my hands endlessly. I have decided to go another route, since my home is sufficiently stocked, I own a shovel and most importantly the liquor cabinet is always at full inventory. Therefore, I am going to start a drinking game, I will take a shot for each inch of snow that falls.

By the end of the storm, I won’t care how much shoveling there is ahead of me.

Drink and dig out safely – Cheers!

Thursday, January 28, 2010

News: Rinse, Lather, Repeat

I visited my family abroad this past fall. After not having been there for 20 years, we created a laundry list of memories. All of which I will cherish and some I have already shared. It is time for the next installment.

I spent a week with my Mother’s siblings all gathered together in one location. Their ages range from 68 to 84. My Uncle a retired dentist would be the first to rise and leave the house to gather fresh bread for breakfast and probably every newspaper printed in the town. He would return with at least eight different publications.

We would enjoy our breakfast while the television was on always set to a news channel. Their daily itinerary went something like this:

9 am: Hearty breakfast with the entire family, television on.

10 am: The youngsters would clean up the kitchen; the elders would retire to the family room each with a publication, television still on.

11:45 am: A few of the elders would go down for a nap.

12:45pm: Lunch, accompanied by a spirited recollection of the major headlines of each publication, television news on.

4:00 pm Tea time on the balcony, no television. Instead, each sibling would report a headline as though it was breaking news. Those paying attention would listen intently.

7:30 pm Multi course dinner with television on and discourse on all the days’ news.

By about day 2, I was bored with the news. I was on vacation, didn’t care what was going on in the world. However, I did not want to offend my Aunts and Uncles so I paid attention to one of the many news related television shows only to find that 2 gentlemen were actually holding up each of the 8 publications that were rotating through our family room. They were reading the news to the viewers. What a concept? Perhaps it was a service for those who may be homebound or maybe for the illiterate. I made the mistake of asking my Uncle why he bothered buying the papers since all of them watched this program in addition to reading the papers. He told me that was the only way they could all be entertained en mass. He also told me to keep my revelation to myself.

Basically, if it aint broke, don’t’ fix it. You have to love the crazy family. I wouldn’t have it any other way.

Wednesday, January 13, 2010

Dear 2010

I had all these aspirations for a brand spanking new decade, things were untried, fresh, blah blah. You have disappointed me and a few others 2010.

Seriously, if this is any indication how this year is going to pan out, I am screwed! I started out my mantra for the new year with Rainbows & Unicorns. That's right, cynical Wicked H thought by thinking warm and fuzzy thoughts, things would find a way to work themselves out.


Let me tell you 2010. It will take more than a Chica who doesn't utter a word of Espanol among other things to bring me down. While we are at it, lay off the rest of my family 2010. The tenant who vacated BS's premises in a very ugly way will not bring her down either. We are stronger than that. You heard me.

Bring it 2010, we are mightier than you my strapping decade.

Change in mantra....VODKA & WINE.


Hiccups and Kisses!