Thursday, March 29, 2007

Home Stretch

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Well friends, it has been one long month. For someone who is deathly afraid of the dentist, in the past thirty days he and I have become quite close. If I am not mistaken, I may have single handedly financed two of his eight children’s college education. I don’t want to jinx myself or him at this point, but I am hoping and praying that I have reached the summit of my dental debacle.

I will spare you most of the gory details. I would like to share that when I told my sister the brain surgeon the details of the major procedure I had done, she herself told me to stop. BS said that if I didn’t stop with the details, she was going to vomit. This, from the woman who digs into people’s brains every day at least thirty times a day. Enough said.

I have been plagued with bad teeth forever. I’ve been through countless procedures. My previous dentist who could not completely numb my mouth due to scar tissue, told me that either he’d have to stop mid-extraction or I would have to tough it out. He had given me the legal and illegal limit of Novocain. I told him that if he didn’t mind me breaking the arm rest of his surgical dental lounge chair, to carry on. He must have thought I was kidding because the look of surprise when I handed him the entire arm rest was priceless.

Friends, I urge you not to repeat my mistakes. Be responsible flossers. Listen to your dental professionals. Or suffer the consequences and be prepared to put their children through college or finance the remodeling of their recreation room.

11 comments:

sophie said...

Take drugs. It is not good to gross out the BS. Hope things get better soon.

Crazy Lady said...

I hate the dentist. I have been putting it off, but I know I will have to drag my sorry self in there one of these days.

I hope you heal soon!

HotForSimon said...

Can't wait to see the finished product.

Feel free to head south next week. I have the entire week off and the company bailed on me...there's plenty of room at the Inn.

wallofdenial said...

Dentist's suck.....But not as bad as a tooth problem. I have decided that there has to be a better way. Perhaps some sort of genetic resolution, where our immune system can defeat the bacteria involved.

t2ed said...

For some reason, I keep thinking of Laurence Olivier in Marathon Man.

Did you dentist keep asking you if "it" was safe?

Just wondering...

The CEO said...

I still have problems flossing, my hands are too big for my mouth, seriously. But I had my upper teeth knocked out in an automobile accident. I spent months in a dentist's chair, as he dug out roots and generally had a great time for a dentist. Needles in the roof of my mouth. I feel your pain.

I have a full bottle, and an almost full bottle of Bombay Sapphire sitting here. It would take nothing to put your name on one, and then the other as we finished them. Dress is casual.The weekend is open at the moment. At least one bottle is going no matter what.

~Jennifer said...

Oh, I'm sorry. I have dental work in my very near future (like next Monday) and I hate going to the dentist too. I sometimes wake up in a panic in the middle of the night at the mere thought of calling to make an overdue dentist appointment. Unfortunately, breaking a tooth makes putting it off any longer nearly impossible. :-P

Wicked H said...

Sophie: I honestly only needed 2 doses of the drugs. Those 8 hours are a blur. Also, I consider it an accomplishment to gross out BS, but I am twisted that way. I am feeling much better, thanks!

Crazy: Thanks, I am over the worst of it now.

HFS: Me too, but I have about 6 months before we get to the end result. Wish I could make the journey but unfortunately not. YOu and Jr enjoy the week!

Wicked H said...

Dave: Dentists do have all kinds of contraptions that do suck! I really like this Dentist but that doesn't make me any braver each time I recline in that chair. The genetic bacteria fighting agent would be fabulous. Is that something you are working on???

t2ed: You know what, he was mumbling that under the mask. NOW I get it.....

Wicked H said...

CEO: Okay. I have to work all weekend but there is absolutely no reason why I cannot share a couple of cocktails with you. I'll be there around 6.

~Jennifer: Ouchie! I hope it goes smoothly for you. I can suggest a little bit of Zanax right before you walk in to the appointment. It takes the edge off. Good luck!

Amy said...

Ummm, why isn't your dentist giving you a valium as a pre-med before each appointment? Many will do this to ease anxiety.

Sorry that is just the former dental assistant in me coming out...

Hope it's over with quickly!!!