Tuesday, November 28, 2006

Say NO to Crack

At the end of the Spa getaway, BS and I went on down the Ocean to visit Mama and Papa Bear. They made their annual Autumnal trek to the beach time share.

Forget that their condo was neither ocean front nor aesthetically pleasing, sometimes you just have to roll with it. We decided to surprise them while they were at the Beach. We just showed up, found the place they were staying and called them on their cell phone to let them know they had a flat tire. It was the only way we could think of to get them to come to the balcony/window of the unit they were in. That’s how we roll.

Once our surprise was appreciated we went off to dinner. Off season, there weren’t many choices but BS took the initiative to be proactive and did some research online and we decided on a restaurant that was much further than 2 minutes from where they were staying. Blasphemous according to Papa Bear, but he was out numbered.

When we arrived back to the time share, we encountered a couple of other guests. A rather strange duo of men; one was clearly mentally challenged and the other was temporarily physically challenged. They were both huddled near the elevator, one was trying to navigate his new crutches the other offering moral support. We were all at the elevator at the same time. Once the lift arrived, I asked the duo if they wanted to board first as there would be no way for all of us to ride together. Crutch Man stated that we should go ahead as he was still trying to get around.

We were happily ensconced in the time share enjoying Dancing with the Stars when BS’s cell started to ring. I don’t remember what the urgency of the call was but BS felt like she needed to step out of the time share to be able to handle the “crisis” at home. Since my parents are in their 80’s the TV is usually viewed at the highest level of sound as possible.

BS stepped into the hallway of the time share when she was greeted with the ass crack of Crutch Man. It seems that Crutch Man and his friend decided it would be easier if he rode on a luggage cart rather than learn how to use the crutches. What BS encountered was Crutch Man trying to step off the cart just as she was opening the door.

From the sound of her exclamation, it was not a sight to behold. She quickly slammed the door shut and went out onto the balcony to asses the cell phone situation.


Phillip said...

"my eyes, MY EYES!!!!!"

Is that what she exclaimed?

Miss Britt said...

ahhh... I love a good ass crack story first thing in the morning.

Nutcracker Sweet 54 said...

Oiy Vey!!! The crack still haunts me to this day!!

Amy said...

I'm with Miss Britt, I prefer not to look at them, but I do love a good ass crack story.

HotForSimon said...

She quickly slammed the door shut and went out onto the balcony to asses the cell phone situation.

ASSESS?? You couldn't have picked a better word if you tried!!! LMAO

Anonymous said...

Glad I missed the show,,,,It's a personal prefrence

Wicked H said...

Hey All: I still laugh to the point of crying when I remember the sound BS made. It is very similar to the sound she makes shen she sees an arachnoid!!!

BTW, Nutcracker Sweet 54 and BS are one in the same. Oh how I love to divulge certain family secrets.

As always, thanks for the comments and for the love of God, keep your pants pulled up.