Thursday, September 21, 2006

Dear Trader Joe’s Patron:

All right. I am only going to say this once lady, pay attention.

If you have enough time to fondle every single melon in the display, then you most certainly have enough time to wait on line to pay for your perfect gourd. I cannot believe you were trying to play the “I am late to pick up my child” card when you spent 16 minutes palpating fruit. We all have busy lives and each of our minutes are just as precious as yours. If you are so late to pick up Junior, explain to me how you had the time to write a check for one item?

I almost offered to pay the grocery tab of the woman who would not let you go ahead of her in line. I did offer to give her one of my bottles of wine while I was walking back to my car. How did I know it took you 16 minutes to finalize your melon choice? You kept her from even looking at them.

There is a God and today she was staking her claim at Trader Joe’s.

7 comments:

t2ed said...

If I saw someone take that long to pick out any fruit or vegetable, I'd have blurted out, "Are you going to eat it or date it?"

Yes, it's a rare gift to have no on deck circle in my head. It's always batter up there.

Wicked H said...

t2ed: You cannot begin to know how much restraint I exhibited. I am more than thankful for the "no" woman. Maybe the results of the vacation have made my edges a little softer. There are bets out there to see how long it will last. I promise to use your line if I ever run into this situation again.

Phillip said...

You did not give melon woman the smack down??? That is most definitely a huge sign of restraint. Bravo!

I'll take the bet.....I give it 2 weeks. LOL

HotForSimon said...

You could have thrown a tomato at her...that might have gotten her out of there quicker!!! LOL

Wicked H said...

Trust me HFS, had I witnessed the fondling she would have been pelted with something. I only know because the woman who would be Queen told me outside while accepting my bottle of wine.

God Bless 'Merica

Phillip: i almost lost it control yesterday but I channelled beach scenes and I was okay. Whew!!

wallofdenial said...

Oh my GAWD.....How in the hell did you pass up an opportunity to play the smash the mellon??????

Amy said...

Why, oh, WHY are the people shopping in Trader Joe's ALWAYS RUDE???? Why???
I don't get it and I love that store...