Tuesday, June 09, 2009

Stating the Obvious

I returned home to find half of my tree laying in my front yard. I was away for the weekend and while gone, my pear tree was hit by lightning. Thankfully, the huge limb fell directly into my yard without injuring any property or individuals. It simply fell on the grass without malice waiting to be removed. No harm or foul to anyone else.

After spending a couple of nights away from home, I was eager to crawl into my own bed, watch the Tony’s and drift off to sleep. My plan was working until my doorbell rang. I wasn’t expecting anyone and since it was 9 pm I decided to ignore it. The bell rang two more times followed by incessant knocking. Whoever was at my door was not going away. I made myself presentable and answered the door.

Wicked H: (Opening only the main door, my storm door is always locked) May I help you?

Man with Dog: Hey, did you know your tree fell?

Wicked H: No? Seriously? What is it that you want?

Man with Dog: Just letting you know the tree fell.

Wicked H: Do you often knock on doors of total strangers at this hour?

Man with Dog: Well, I saw the tree and thought you should know.

Wicked H: It’s a bit hard to miss, but thanks all the same. If there is nothing else, I bid you farewell.

I locked the door and got ready for bed, again. Of course it took me quite a while to unwind. I have to admit that when I heard the insistence of the knock, I figured there might be a fire in the vicinity and a kind soul was alerting me to that fact. Instead I get a botanical report from what I guess is either a nosy neighbor or someone casing the joint. The whole scenario would have made sense if the tree was blocking the man’s efforts to walk his dog or the tree was laying on his property or vehicle. None of these was the case.

All I wanted was a peaceful end to my weekend. Instead I get Gladys’ husband and their dog.


Alex said...

This is one of the things I miss about apartment living -- the need for visitors to call from downstairs, and the option to ignore them.

t2ed said...

My neighbors did the same thing to me one time. Like I wouldn't have discovered the tree on my own the next morning when the dog attempted to drag it into the house.

I really wanted to start screaming "This was no lightning accident" like out of Jaws. Unfortunately, I resisted.

carrie said...

people can be so strange.

wallofdenial said...

You City people are weird...MY neibors would have shown up with chains saw's and I would have only noticed the tree had changed and saw dust in the yard

TC said...

Reminds me of the time I was trying to get back in my driveway with the car after snow. There were cows chasing my car (I mistakenly honked @ them to make them get out of the way, they thought I was calling them to supper, NOT MY COWS) Anyway a lady in a car pulled in behind me and she asked me if I knew my cows were chasing my car down the highway, I wanted to say so badly, "you didn't hear? those aren't my cows but I'm the cow whisperer" and watch how fast she left. But I merely told her they weren't my cows and she left puzzled.

Tony said...

Hi Wicked H, came across your blog via blog explosion. I kinda found the whole experience very amusing. Funny life experience post.

The CEO said...

Maybe he was hoping for a date?

bing said...

that's uncalled for. i felt scared for you... you know, there are also sickos who just knock on doors and do some nasty things.

Wicked H said...

Alex: Generally if I am not expecting anyone, i don't answer the door. Especially at that hour...

t2ed:Great restraint on your part - bravo!

Carrie: That is exactly what I'm saying.

WOD: City folk, we are a bit whacky.

TC: Now, THAT is hilarious.

Tony: Visit anytime, thanks.

CEO: I don't date married men. Darn principles of mine...

Bing: It was a tad unsettling.

Anonymous said...

Oh, if only people would mind their own business. I work for a 9-1-1 center and with the use of cell phones, everyone calls at the least little thing. I would bet that someone even called 9-1-1 to let them know your tree limb fell into your yard. I wonder what the gent would have said had you told him that was a modern yard ornament and that he needs to get with the times. A big tree limb laying in your yard is the "in" thing right now. Just be sure to clean up after your dog when you leave.
Actually, It sounds as if he may not be too bright and his intentions were good but he just couldn't work it out that the limb was causing no harm to anyone or anything and was no threat, just walk on by.
Anyway, I came across your blog on blogexplosion and have enjoyed my visit to it and have blogmarked it. Thanks. very interesting.

Anonymous said...

So if your house was on fire, he should pass by and mind his own business? What if you didn't know that the tree had fallen?