Sunday, October 19, 2008

Random Acts of Tagness

T2ed, who apparently is too stubborn to call the Dog Whisperer, has tagged me. Since I understand what it is like to be beaten by pups, I shall indulge him.

Who knew random came in sevens? There may be a quiz requiring a number two pencil. It may behoove you to pay attention.

1) I was raised to be afraid of doctors. (Considering the fact that my own Dad is a physician I always felt this tactic was odd.) The only time I would have to go to my pediatrician was for immunizations. All other normal childhood ailments my Dad would treat. When I was misbehaving, my Mom would threaten me with a visit to the doctor for a shot. I hated shots. It got to the point of me diving under the dining room table when Mom tried to get me to my scheduled pediatrician visits. Luckily for me, I had a wonderful doctor. He was pretty smart too, he taught me to be afraid of the nurses with the needles and not him. Brilliant!

2) If you are a solicitor, you’d be wise to not knock on my door. My home is my sanctuary. The last thing I want in an unwanted visit from a salesperson or Jehovah’s Witness. The last time I slipped and answered the door on a weekend, I was greeted by 2 persistent Jehovah’s Witnesses. They would not leave so that I could close my door. So I told them that I would be happy to listen to their spiel if they didn’t mind coming in while I sacrificed a Christian. Amazing how fast they flew down the front steps. Come to think of it, they’ve never knocked since.

3) I am an avid dog lover. However, the loss of my golden retriever is still so very painful that I don’t think I will ever get another dog. Dexter and I had 13 wonderful years together but I will never forget the pain I felt the day I had to take him to be put down. I know many of us have had terrific pets/furry children in our lives but he can never be replaced. Also I don’t think I have the emotional strength to ever have to go through losing a pet in that way again. Maybe I am a coward.

4) Although I am getting much better, I am a holder of grudges. I have a very high tolerance for bullshit. However, if you purposefully hurt me, you are done. I will not waste the time with useless confrontations, I will simply hit the delete button. Poof, you will exit my radar for good. There are plenty of great radar blips that I refuse to scramble the signals with the bad.

5) When I was seven years old, my younger sister was born. My parents were not necessarily planning this third child which might explain why we had a 4 month old puppy when she was born. The puppy was extremely jealous of the baby and my Mom decided we had to give the puppy away. I was devastated; not only was I not the youngest but the baby was the reason the puppy was departing. In retaliation, when she was six months old, I attempted to throw my baby sister into the trash. She was minding her own business in her playpen when I took her out and tried stuffing her into the tiny trash can in my bedroom. She looked like a Jack-in-the-Box, so I quietly returned her to the playpen. I did not admit to this until I was 18.

6) I may be one of a very few females who dislikes shopping. Let me clarify, I dislike shopping in stores. I love the ease and comfort of pointing and clicking my way to bargains and treasures online. The thought of spending my cherished free (non-working) time fighting someone over a parking space or playing bumper carts in a grocery store, sucks the life right out of me. Those of you, which includes both my sisters and Mom, who find solace in shopping, kudos to you. I simply do not find anything relaxing about the whole ordeal.

7) Laughter is the best medicine and the first line of defense. Lets face it, these days if you can’t find anything to laugh at, stay away from building with more than fifteen stories or loaded firearms. I make sure I enjoy a hearty belly laugh at least once a day, more like once an hour. I am known as the spirit lifter at work. I am frequently called upon to make someone laugh. Laughter comes easier when you learn how not to sweat the small stuff.

Whew! Okay, you can all relax. That was cathartic. I won’t tag anyone. However, if you’d like to randomize, drop me a line in the comments and I will gladly come by and read.

The quiz is scheduled for Wednesday afternoon; good luck.


t2ed said...

I will confess to using the hounds twice in the last two days to blowing off salespeeps.

You'd be surprised how semi-psychotic barking and "This isn't a good time" makes them scamper.

Though I toyed with releasing them to see how fast the Fuller Brush Man really was.

qualcosa di bello said...

i don't like shopping either. there, i said daughters are shaking their heads in dismay!

The CEO said...

Wow you're tough. I have never considered human sacrifice as a strategy t deter those that want to convert my religious beliefs. Good thinking.
I thought that the doctor thing came from working with them.

Onknees (not_onknees at the moment) said...

I admit using the Jehovahs Witnesses to get back at my mother once when she would not give me permission to do something. When they came to the door, she would hide in the bedroom and have me tell them she was not home. The day she pissed me off, I invited them in, offered them refreshments and said she would be out in a minute. I knocked on my moms door, told her they were in the living room and skipped next door to play.
I got my ass whooped later that night.
PS: I dont like to shop either

Jazzy said...

That Jehovah's Witness comment was crazy LOL! Luckily for me, we just moved into a gated building, so we don't have that issue anymore.

Drofen said...

We have a golden, Beau, that I dread the day he goes to chase the big tennis ball in the sky. That will be a sad, sad day for our family.

I'm so sorry to hear about Dexter.

Nutcracker Sweet 54 said...

I enjoyed the revisited stories....Dexter is always in our prayters and Google has his eyes and the way he used to look sometimes.