Wednesday, May 07, 2008

Dear Springtime Cyclist:

Dude! Listen, I am all for everyone embracing the fabulous weather and exercising. Truly, kudos to you.

However, some things are better left to the imagination. Seriously, green mylar micro-mini shorts with birken stocks is not appropriate in any situation let alone outdoor cycling. Believe me when I tell you that more clothes are needed when exposing your self to the ultra violet waves and the public for the first time.

Are you familiar with the term snowblind? Yes, that much glare is not healthy for you or the general public. Cover up, wear suitable shoes for biking and please, don’t forget your helmet.

Hugs and Kisses

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

Well now, there's something that causes me to avert my eyes....the Roxiticus Valley is not a biking town.

Roxy

Berryvox said...

Ouch. Now I've got Diet Coke up the nose from laughing.

The CEO said...

Have you considered a large flashing strobe light sign when he cycles by, to make the point, naturally. With stadium loud speakers.

t2ed said...

I really hope he goes for black socks with the Birkenstocks to cover up the too white leggage on display.

Cycle Jerk said...

I rode to work everyday, all through the winter and I have earned the right to wear whatever ridiculous ensemble I can dream up or pull from the hamper. That said I always wear a helmet.

Cheers

Anonymous said...

Amen Cycle Jerk....

and to be completely honest, I find the most horrible outfits are worn by those walking down the streets and riding the metro. There is never an occassion to wear a dress over a tank top and white socks with sandals. On top of that, keep the braided belt at home.

Wicked H said...

Yikes, I believe I have hit a nerve with the cyclists of the blogosphere.

To be clear, I did not wave a broad brush and label all cyclists as fashion backwards. Just this one.

That being said Cycle Jerk and Jason, points taken.

The rest of the fine commenters are laughing with me, not at you.

Whew, I feel much better.

Weary Hag said...

Oh, and PS Springtime Cyclist:
If you can get yourself together enough with all the above advice ... stay OUT of my FLIPPING car-lane on country roads. "I" may respect you but my truck does NOT respect your bicycle. It has no feelings.