Discriminating Debate

Over the weekend we had a belated birthday cookout for my Parents. Yes, I meant both parents. They were born on the same day, month and year; my Mom is a few hours older than my Dad. Soul mates for sure.

While enjoying our dinner the topic turned to American Idol. I have admitted on this site that the show has lost my interest but I do still DVR it and fast forward through most of it. I am familiar with the contestants and do not really have an allegiance to any one in particular.

Both my B-I-Ls made a rather odd statement about the show this year that I thought I’d share here. B-I-L 2 stated that he was glad Carly was gone because she wasn’t American. B-I-L 1 stated that he felt the exact same way when the Australian contestant was eliminated. I was a little shocked by both their statements as every one of us around the table have an ethnic heritage.

Wicked: (question to B-I-L 1) Just where exactly are you from?

BIL 1: Millersville!

Wicked: Try again.

BIL 1: Oh, okay...PA.

Wicked: Your roots are?

BIL 1: Italian.

BIL 2: I know what you mean, every single contestant is from some where else. Couldn’t they find Americans?

Wicked: Um guys, unless Simon Cowell goes up to the Native American Reservations and searches for contestants from there, the show is representative of America. The melting pot. The reason your ancestors and my parents came to this country. Land of opportunity, etc.

I have never cleared a room so fast in my life. I will have to use this tool again, soon.

Fashionably Late, as Usual

In honor of Earth Day/Week, I have adopted a new pet. Rather, the pet has adopted my abode.

Now I will have you know that the old Wicked’s instinct would have been to swat at the critter and scream like a girl. Possibly breaking a hip while hurling myself down the front steps. I’ll have you know that the new, improved Wicked has become more nature friendly.

Behold, the beauty that has taken residence on my porch light.


Your mission, should you choose to accept, is to name that moth.

Ready. Go!

Sign of the Times

It doesn't matter to me who you'll vote for; it matters more that you snorted out loud.

Happy weekend kids!

Dear Neighbor:

Let me preface this by letting you know I am an avid dog lover. LOVE. DOGS.

However, the incessant barking and annoying whelping of your two chows are absolutely killing me. We do not know each other well enough for me to give you advice personally on how to give your dogs the attention they are obviously craving. Therefor I am going to let you know here. Otherwise, I am going to lose my mind.

Look lady. The postage stamp size fenced in back yard of yours is most definitely not enough for them to exercise. I’ve seen them on leashes when you transport them to and from your vehicle, they seem to enjoy the leash. How about taking them for at least one daily stroll. Seriously, our neighborhood is extremely dog friendly. At any given moment, there are at least five dogs out strolling with their owners. Guess what? You never hear any of the exercised dogs constantly barking and whelping while out in their respective decks/yards. Why? Because they know their surroundings first hand and they are simply enjoying the fresh air.

Luckily, I leave for work everyday right around the time both of your furry ones are pleading to be let back into the house. The first time I heard the gut wrenching yelping, I ran out onto my deck at O Dark Thirty because I was sure someone was mutilating one or both. All they want is to be let back in for some attention indoors. Hearing the yelping noise in stereo is not only unsettling but down right uncourteous to the rest of the neighborhood.

I am begging you to show your pups some love. It doesn’t take a rocket scientist to understand that they simply do not enjoy spending more than twenty minutes on your deck. They want in. Try the walks. It couldn’t hurt.

Don’t make me have to call Cesar the Whisperer

Swamped

Many things going on sending me into funk-o-mania.

Please send new cocktail recipes.

Hugs & Kisses

Wicked

Snorty and Hacky

Words used to describe the vibe of Grand Parents Day at Lil Wicked’s school.

She comes by it honestly. I have reached the pinnacle of Auntie pride.

God, I love that kid!